Life and death...

This morning I woke up to the very sad news that one of the members of my fellowship, FL, passed away yesterday. I had never actually met her... but I had planned to meet her in London in the fall. She was beautiful, thirty two years old and was about to be married to the love of her life in August. Her death came as a shock to all of us. I've been struck by the outpouring of love for her: the times she made others smile, the dinners together, the impact she had on others' lives, the way she lived every moment to its fullest.

More than that, for almost the first time in my life, I realize that life is such an unpredictable thing. We can't plan for tomorrow, because we don't know where we'll be tomorrow... so all that matters is today. I started this blog with the intention of finding my own path to peace and of engaging others on the journey with me. I've always felt that I'll wait until I have that PhD or JD to make a difference in the world. I've always felt so helpless. What can I possibly do now? I don't have the resources or the capacity to change the world.... but today I realized that my time on this planet may be very limited.

So there's no more waiting. I'm not going to wait until I'm academically qualified to change the world. I'll start now... by helping others on a daily basis. Life itself is evanescent and all around me I'm surrounded by angels who provide signs to guide me on my own path. I need to spend more time listening to God- and building my relationship with God.

And to FL... her true beauty lies in the little things that she did for others.... her smile, her compassion and her warmth. That's really what life is about... the little things... not changing the world... but impacting those around you... those next to you... the people you love and care about in your life.

So I'm going to make right all the wrongs I have done so far. I'm going to apologize to those I've been waiting until tomorrow to apologize to....in the hope that I'll find the true path to God.

Here is a song that one of FL's friends shared, in lamenting her recent death. Rest in peace, dear... I never met you, but we all grieve for you... rest in peace... and God's blessings for the next leg of your journey.